You May Never Get Married

“There is no more lovely, friendly or charming relationship, communion or company, than a good marriage.” – Martin Luther

“Love is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit…”- C.S. Lewis

“Ladies, a real man does more than pay for you, he prays for you.” -Jarrid Wilson

While all these quotes contain various degrees of truth, they can also help foster an incredibly harmful thought process among single Christians, one that I have recently heard more and more frequently.

The thought process is seemingly logical and goes like this:

  • Premise A: God loves me and wants me to be happy.
  • Premise B: Marriage would make me happy.
  • Conclusion: God wants me to be married.

This thought process is affirmed with one verse more than any other in all of Scripture:

“Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” – Psalm 37:4

At first glance, this seems to completely validate the thought process formula mentioned above…except in Scripture God gives us a new benchmark by which we measure our happiness. 

A Biblical Thought Process of our Happiness

  • Premise A: God loves me and wants me to be happy.
  • Premise B: The way I get “the desires of my heart” is by delighting myself in God above all else.
  • Conclusion: When I truly delight myself in God, I want more of HIM than anything else (marriage, etc). In other words, GOD becomes the truest and highest desire of my heart and he promises to satisfy our longing to know him and to BE known BY him.

 This thought process changes things for married and single Christians alike:

To the married Christian: This means your spouse does not complete you. They do not make you whole and your life would go on without them (as hard as that would be) because Jesus alone makes you whole and completes you. To claim otherwise would be to claim your spouse is a functional Savior.

To the single Christian: This means you may never get married. It may not be God’s will for you, or it may just never happen for an infinite number of reasons or circumstances. You may never get married, but you’ll always be loved. You’ll always be radically loved by a God wants to open your eyes to his grace. He really is all you need. Grace really is that good.

I don’t know if you’re single, dating, engaged, or married. But no matter what your relationship status is, Jesus is enough. It’s JESUS ALONE that saves us and JESUS ALONE that sustains us in the abundant life he offers (John 10:10) by giving us the desires of our heart as we delight in JESUS above all else.

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